Well, I've been back in Vegas awhile now and it is definitely wearing on me. I'm not miserable but I'm certainly not happy. I am not the kind of person that likes to remain idle (especially in the desert). If I am not doing something that I feel is a contribution to myself or others I am going nuts. Being in school over the spring is how I maintained my sanity here. I absolutely hate Las Vegas and without a distraction of some sort I get very depressed. Getting a job seems like a good solution but we will only be here until the middle of August at the latest (please please please) and I would hate to get a job and quit within a month and a half. I try to keep a smile on my face but I know at times it must look contrived. There are times when I am glad to be here like when Paul is in a tournament and we are busy running around and whatnot, but when that's not the case we get up late, play video games and lay around. I try to go to the gym regularly and I'm pretty successful at it most of the time but it's hard when we have on average 2 people staying with us at all times and everyone has different agendas for the day. I am now 10lbs heavier than I've ever been and that's only since we have lived in Vegas. I'm sure it is a combination of my unhappiness, sedentary lifestyle and dinners out about 4 times a week. When we didn't have tons of people in and out I would cook almost every night and eat pretty healthy, but it's difficult now. My weight issue is a huge part of my unhappiness. I have never struggled with it until recently and my self esteem has taken a pretty huge hit. I'm not looking for compliments, just stating the facts. Anyways, I gotta wrap it up....we're headed to Capo's (my favorite Italian restaurant) :)
I don't want anyone reading this to get the wrong idea. I love all of Paul's friends and really enjoy the company most of the time and I know how incredibly lucky I am to even have the option of not having a job. I am very grateful and appreciative of all the great things in my life....I guess I just needed to have a little pity party.
2 comments:
Can I come to your party?! I'm sorry you are a sad little pup babe, but we won't live here much longer. Even when we do come back to Vegas, we'll have a smaller place, so that no one can live with us, even if we want them to :) Love you lots!
Sounds like Paul loves you very much. I know you're a little lonesome and bored right now, because you are used to being on the go 24/7. Sweetie just try and relax and before you know it you will be busier than you want to be. School is starting soon and that will help alot (to be doing something to accomplish your own goals. Love you sweetie, mom
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