what to do...what to do

I have led a somewhat nomadic lifestyle, moving from place to place my entire life. I went to 6 different elementary schools growing up, never staying at one longer than the school year and since graduation from high school I have moved 18 times (with kitty in tow). A lot of this has to do with the fact that I cannot seem to make a decision about what I want to do with my life. The longest period of time that I have ever had the same job is 3 years and that's not b/c I get fired, it's just b/c I get bored. I have boxes that I literally have not unpacked for 6yrs. YIKES! I think it's because I am always expecting to uproot yet again. I'm going to make a pact with myself that if those boxes aren't unpacked by the time I'm thirty, I don't really need any of that crap that is in them anyways and i should just throw them away.

I think that when someone wants to do so many things they end up doing nothing because they can never focus long enough on one thing to make it happen. I have been going to college on and off (mostly on) since I graduated high school and still have nothing to show for it. I have changed my mind so many times regarding the career pathway I would like to choose that all I have managed to do is wander in circles.

Finally I realize that I definitely want to go into medicine but I am struggling at a fork in the road. One road is that to a Physician's Assistant Program and the other is to Paramedic School.

Benefits of being a PA:
1) They make lots of dough
2) They play a much more intimate role regarding a patients long term treatment whereas a paramedic is with a patient for only a matter of minutes.
3) Chances of getting spit on, punched in the face or covered in poo are significantly less
4) They make lots of dough

Benefits of being a paramedic
1) Everyday is different
2) You get the chance to relate to patients in a way that no one else gets to
3) You get to drive super fast on the wrong side of the road and sometimes on sidewalks
4) You only have to spend a matter of minutes with patients ( a good thing when they are covered in poo)

Anyways, I loved being an EMT and at the time that I quit that job I was definitely ready for paramedic school. But, being a paramedic is dangerous. Not only are you putting yourself in precarious situations at times, it is also physically demanding and the chances of suffering a life long debilitating back injury are incredibly high. The schedules are horrendous (12 hr shifts, 4 days a week) The pay is even worse (14.50 per hr for starting medics) But damn...it was fun! I just think that, even though there were a lot of things I loved about that job, I should grow up and make a responsible decision.

One of the reasons I opted to try for a PA program instead of nursing is one of the reasons why I'm not sure I would be content as a paramedic. Once a paramedic enters a hospital with a patient, more often than not, a doctor could not care less about what the paramedic has to say. To most doctors a paramedic is nothing more than a glorified taxi driver. Personally, I have a great interest in the pathology behind a patients symptoms which, in turn, drives me to be more inquisitive and learn as much as I can about different ailments, medications, side effects, etc. I wonder if I would be content to just be the taxi driver. As an EMT I always wanted to know more and be more involved. Nurses are kind of in the same element. They take orders from doctors and that's pretty much it. There are exceptions, I know, but for the most part it is not in their job description to make decisions. That would drive me nuts. I want to make decisions and call the shots. So......it's either calling the shots in field as a paramedic or calling the shots (I'd still have to work under a doctors supervision but I'd get to tell the nurses what to do ;) in an ER or a clinic or wherever as a PA.