I'm not sure if everyone is like this or maybe just crazy me but in high school there was this girl that I kind of idolized. She was in my class and I was friends with her but not really close friends. Even to this day I'm not really sure why I put her up on a pedestal but I think it was because she embodied at that time what I hoped to become with time. She was not more beautiful or more intelligent or more popular than other girls she was just always "her" and that is what I admired about her. She was never a lot of things, but always one thing and that was genuine. And that is how I have always hoped to be. I cannot even begin to express the amount of situations in my life in which I have asked myself if she would have done the same thing if she was in my position. I know this may sound odd but we all have people we look up to and try to model ourselves after.

Anyways, since graduation and my release into the wild I have always strived to be a "good person". I'm not sure what this means but to me it means looking upon the world with always innocent eyes, no preconceptions, no judgement, a good sense of humor, the ability to to see the best in people, to discern right from wrong, to have honest empathy and the consternation to follow your heart. I have always strived for these qualities and sometimes I am proud of myself and other times I feel like I don't know myself at all. But what I have noticed lately about myself is that I am more like the girl I idolized in high school than I have ever been and that feels really good. This actual girl is not so important as what she instilled in me at a crucial time in my adolescence. I certainly don't have the desire to look her up now because that is not the point. The point is what I learned from her when it was important and for that I am forever grateful.